
It's early on a Saturday and it looks like the crazies are already coming out. It appears that there is a rumor going around that Jessica Simpson, the former Nuclear Scientist and MIT graduate (j/k), is slated to play Samus Aran in the upcoming Metroid movie that is supposedly directed by Uwe Boll?
Look, as cool as it would be to have a new Metroid movie, this is doubtful for so many reasons. Simpson isn't exactly a great actress and Uwe Boll is a complete idiot when it comes to realizing video games on the silver screen (or DVD in most cases). On top that, wouldn't Nintendo actually tap some people with talent to make a film based on a major franchise? We remember the rushed Christmas flop known as the Super Mario Bros. Movie.
But for kicks, here's what the rumor states:
"Actress Jessica Simpson is rumored to have secured the role of Space Bounty Hunter Samus Aran in a Hollywood version of a Nintendo game. In the game, Metroid, the hero controls Samus on her goal to rid the world of energy sucking beasts called Metroids. Think of it as a cross between Aliens and Dracula.
Simpson is excited to restart her movie career and is reportedly taking part in the selection of Samus' love interest. Simpson's publicists has also confirmed that she will be contributing to the plot. "Ms Simpson feels the plot is too complex and would like to move the plot closer to it's core story of love and adventure.
The movie, rumored to be directed by famed director Uwe Boll will feature a wise cracking ethnic Metroid played by the fat kid from good burger."
What do you think?
Stupid Rumor Source: VG Chartz (Via RumorMiller)




Comments
And WTF are you talking about a bad Zelda game? Are you ten yers old or just dumb?
And Jessica Simpson as Samus? Letting this airheaded bimbo play one of the best female protagonists ever brought to gaming is one of the most inexcusable casting choices ever.
I'm with ya on that one, Warhead. I would much rather have, say, Tara Reid play the part, or even Mila Kunis. Anybody that dosn't have the last name of "Simpson" or "Lohan."
WTF?!?!?!?!?!?
I sure hope to hell this is some bs rumor. Whats next? The Legend of Zelda directed by Kevin Smith and starrring Seth Rogan?
I really do hope this is gonna stay a rumor though, If it isn't may god have mercy on us all
VGChartz and RumorMiller probably just wanted traffic.
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